To be or not to be..

TO BE OR NOT TO BE..

A phase comes in every teenager's life when they are made to take a break from all the fun and folly. People start asking about the future plans, even though they are aware that more than half of the teen population is clueless about where and what it is heading for. Well I am not exactly a teenager - but some where between the teenage and adulthood (but since these days teenage is the only period when all the fun starts and ends, I still prefer to call myself one !). The point is I had been enjoying my teenage life so much that I had totally forgotten that soon next step would have to be taken. And guess what I've just entered that next phase. Being a third year student (of the five-years integrated course of law) I'm posed almost every day with questions about what I hope to do - whether I had any plans or was I still framing them. If the former then what they are; and if the latter then again "what is your progress?" "Can we be of any help?" It's at that moment that I feel like telling them to find someone else to boast about their career counselling tips. But on the contrary I'm left humiliated (because of my zero planning) and have to be courteous enough to receive all the good advice and be grateful for that (along with a promise that I would try my best to incorporate them in my life).

Now the question arises that why do they have to bother me with such queries and that too pertaining my own life. Well maybe they are genuinely concerned about me and want to make sure that I don't end up being a total daffy. But on the contrary I feel most of them just think that all I've been doing is day dreaming and it's high time that I should be pulled down back to earth to face the ground reality. Thereby they snatch away the dreams which I may have actually been developing. For instance I had been planning to give a serious thought to sideline my legal career as secondary and venture into the field of journalism as my primary field of work. Now most of my acquaintances would never approve of such plans. After all they would never expect me to drop the lucrative packages I might be offered at the end of my law school and instead start from the scratch only to pursue my interests.

The truth is I have honestly felt that a person undergoes certain changes almost everyday and the instances which occur in his/her life gradually change that person as well as his/her interests. In the beginning of my legal studies I was really excited about the prospect of getting a chance to study at a good law school and wanted to make the most out of it. To be honest I had never chosen law because of some dream of being a top notch lawyer some day. It was the thought of studying at the law school, meeting people of varied nature and interests and to participate in challenging debates and moots, which drew my interest towards this field. And I have very much participated in these activities and enjoyed my law school life immensely. It was while carrying out these very activities that I developed a slightly passionate interest on being a freelance journalist (to further continue with these challenges and come across more interesting people). I never wanted my life to end up being some corporate hotshot, spending my whole day inside those four walls with nothing but few problems of mergers and acquisitions and finance to ponder over. So when today I am asked by everyone about which stream I would like to work on or which law firm I am aiming for, I am left nothing but clueless and above all deeply frustrated. Why can't these people understand that with the passage of time a person's personality evolves and then life does not remain the same as it was? But I am now left stuck in this maelstrom of expectations which my family and friends have from me i.e. to make it big and emerge as a winner in the legal fraternity. I am hoping that some miracle would save me so that I may be able to spare some time for my interest as well. As for now it is inevitable but to start concentrating on strengthening my CV to be capable of beating the crowd of my peers in securing a top job. Yet again I have come to realize this harsh truth that life is not fair in all aspects. But I am still thankful to my law school for letting me at least enjoy the time which I have spent here.